Author: Brent Andrew

Gas Prices – The Big Secret

In California, pump prices of gasoline have gone up over 20 cents per gallon in just the past week. Analysts say a price of $5 per gallon, once unimaginable, is in clear sight by Memorial Day, the start of the traditional summer vacation driving season.

There’s a lot of useless and baseless presidential campaign rhetoric about the link between the administration’s energy policies and gas prices. Many people also hold very naive assumptions about the key determinants of gas prices: distance between the pump and the refinery, accidents and natural disasters, global terrorism, military conflicts, environmental regulations.

Of course, all of those factors do matter in determining gas prices, because they affect the cost of production. But even in sum, they’re almost marginal when compared with the most significant determinant of price.

Here’s the “secret” about the prices energy companies charge: there’s a demand curve for gasoline and it is very inelastic. No matter the price, within certain boundaries, Americans will consume a lot of gas. Profit-maximizing enterprises, like energy companies, will price at a level determined by consumer demand and willingness to pay. Rising gas prices indicate that enough consumers will buy enough gasoline at higher prices to ensure historic company profits.

And if that bothers you, don’t waste time complaining or, worse, pretending the answer lies in drilling more or easing environmental regulation.

The answer – the only answer – is to just stop buying.

PR Disasters – How Not To

Crises happen and communicating through them successfully is hard work. Here are some examples of crisis communication done the wrong way. Read. Learn. Avoid.

Netflix

Netflix has often had troubles communicating with its customers. This year, the CEO’s announcement that he was going to split the company in two puzzled everyone – there was no clear plan or even the slightest hint at a reasonable rationale for the move. Share value plunged, and the announcement was rescinded a mere 23 days later. Analysts wonder if Netflix will regain its previous status as the dominant market player.

News International

The worldwide reputation of News International and CEO Rupert Murdoch took an enormous hit when its newspapers in England were accused of bribing police and illegally wiretapping celebrities, politicians and crime victims. Early denials had to be retracted as more and more evidence proving long-standing patterns of truly horrible behavior made its way to the public.

Lowes

If you’re a home improvement retail chain, here’s something you would pretty much likely want to avoid – having your company name invoked again and again in a political controversy  over Islam in the month before the Christmas shopping season. Lowes pulled ads from a TLC reality show called “All-American Muslim” after receiving Florida Family Association (FFA) demands that it do so.  The FFA asserted the show was really undercover “propaganda that riskily [SIC] hides the Islamic agenda’s clear and present danger to American liberties and traditional values.” Lowes denied the FFA demands had anything to do with its decision, but could not and did not offer a clear explanation as to why it stopped advertising.

Sony 
Over 77 million PlayStation Network accounts were shut down by Sony after the company learned it had been seriously hacked. After many initial refusals to be open about the breaches, Sony contacted customers with mild recommendations for improved Internet safety and a promise the problem would be corrected within 2 weeks. New security problems and breaches pushed that date back again and again. Customers were left to wonder about whether, and to what extent, their own data had been compromised. Cost to the company was estimated at $24 billion in expenses and lost revenue.

Penn State

[My personal thoughts about Penn State and Joe Paterno are here.]

Sexual abuse cases are pure poison for educational institutions. The case involving former assistant coach Jerry Sandusky (photo, above) not only brought down his former boss, the beloved Joe Paterno, and the university’s president, it significantly damaged the reputation of Penn State. The university tried to cover up allegations and evidence of abuse by Sandusky for years before finally admitting wrongdoing and its complicit silence.

Congressman Anthony Weiner 

Weiner sent a college student a photo of his erect penis via Twitter. When the photos quickly circulated the Internet, as Twitter photos are known to do, and landed in the hands of mainstream news organizations, Weiner denied vehemently they were of his member.

When a second person came forward with photos Weiner had sent her, the congressman was forced to call a press conference and admit he’d engaged in the behavior. Soon after, he resigned his seat in Congress.

Durex South Africa

More Twitter stupidity.

Posted on the official DurexSA (condom maker) Twitter account: “Why did God give men penises? So they’d have at least one way to shut a woman up.”

Really funny, huh? Especially in a country that has a serious problem with sexual assault and rape. The company might have issued an apology and the story might have died there. But to lengthen the story and compound the problem the same account posted a defensive whine: “We have posted many jokes, see our timeline… And they not violent against woman! Re-read it!!!!!”

The company eventually apologized, but not before ruining its reputation.

MF Global

In October, after MF Global declared bankruptcy $1.2 billion in customers’ funds were discovered missing.

MF Global CEO Jim Corzine resigned but refused to disclose the disposition of his former customers’ accounts. In sworn congressional testimony, Corzine, the former New Jersey governor, insisted he had no idea what happened to the money and wasn’t aware of the missing funds until MF Global filed for bankruptcy.

Republican Presidential Candidates 

Politics and party aside, these public figures were in a class by themselves. One wonders about the level of campaign staff professionalism.

  • Herman Cain – Cain self-destructed with a lethal combination of ignorance and confidence. He was hit with multiple allegations of extra-marital affairs, always difficult for a “values” candidate, but it was really his poor staff work that finished him off. This interview at a major newspaper’s editorial board revealed his complete lack of preparation for both in the meeting and the job of president.
  • Michele Bachmann – Bachmann has been prone to gaffes throughout her career, so her presidential campaign proved to be an apt moment for opponents to find and disseminate her “greatest hits.” Rather than claiming many were taken out of context, or that she’d evolved her positions as she grew on the job as a member of Congress, Bachmann most frequently chose to either reiterate her indefensible positions or make even more confusing and ignorant ones.
  • Rick Perry – Perry’s entry was much anticipated; he achieved almost instantaneous front-runner status. Almost immediately, however, Perry displayed a complete lack of focus and preparation. Rumors, supported by viral videos, swirled that he’d made campaign appearances drunk or high. His inability at a nationally-televised campaign debate, to name the three federal agencies he wanted to close sealed his political fate.

George, my man

Even though our country celebrated it – to the extent we did – on Monday, today is George Washington’s actual birthday.

He was highly respected, held in the highest esteem and practically venerated by his contemporaries, he is wildly underappreciated today. I’ve just finished a biography by Richard Brookhiser; in Founding Father, Brookhiser digs into the man with the universally recognized name and ubiquitous face we modern Americans actually know very little about.

Turns out, the stuffy looking guy on the $1 bill was actually a pretty tough cat, a great politician, an erudite and eloquent philosopher, an amazing guerilla general who was among the world’s first to understand the concept of long war, and a brilliantly modern spymaster. Oh, he also, apparently, had a nasty temper he had to work hard to control.

Because of this sad mismatch between Washington’s modern image and his living reality, it’s completely fitting his country celebrates him on a day that isn’t even his real birthday.

Happy birthday, George.

Bibleland? No, thank you.

I am a believer, a person of faith. I grew up closely within the context of a particular religious tradition. I still attend and take part in services when I’m able. My moral principles are heavily dependent on my personal history within this tradition. I studied religious history in school, working under several well-known and respected scholars. For several years, I served a religious institution professionally in a leadership position, and continue to consult with others. I have had the great good fortune to meet and come to know many religious leaders, thinkers and scholars.

I am no enemy of faith, or even organized religion.

All that said, I’m appalled at what I’m hearing this campaign season. We have entered a frightening place in which candidates are literally tripping over each other in a race to be more radically Christian than their competitors – outlining ways we might more closely align civil law and public behavior with their narrow-minded interpretations of the Christian Bible.

Here, Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum offers but one example. And what’s so galling about this is the self-righteous presupposition shared by so many candidates that, of course, American law OUGHT to be based on the Christian Bible. In this brief clip, Santorum, again, argues about the “moral” basis of American law – but his “moral” compass clearly points toward a very particular direction, and this direction is never questioned by his competitors, the moderator, or anyone else involved with the campaign.

This is not American.

Look at the photograph (below) of people coming to this country, sometime in the early 20th century. Are they Christian? Who either knows or cares? They came, on shoestrings and guts, with faith in and admiration for our American experiment. With their muscles and talent and ambition and freedom, they built the country we know today. Their descendants, myself included, continue to build and thrive, and enjoy the blessings of liberty afforded us by living in this country.

Let’s get one thing straight: America is not a Christian nation, if by Christian nation we mean a country with social structures, laws and government based solely on Christian principles, especially as interpreted by a narrow-thinking band of Christians. America is also home to Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Sikhs, Hindus, and those of many other religious traditions. And atheists, agnostics, Druids, Wiccans, and so on.

They have their social relationships, laws, and sacred texts too. I happen to live by mine, they by theirs. As an American, I’m in no position to say mine is better, greater or more important when it comes to how we live in the public sphere.

Want a country based on one particular interpretation of one particular religious text? America is not for you. (And, thank God, it never has been.)

Love, Reconsidered

A few days ago, I posted about the character of love. And, in the manner of the wiseass I sometimes am, I answered by listing ten songs that examine love in slightly off-center ways – recordings from David Bowie to Chris Isaak, Bonnie Raitt to Rickie Lee Jones.

More than a few people have asked me, with no little seriousness, if the songs I posted are what I really think love is about. The truthful answer is, yes and no.

I did pick songs I feel an honest connection to, even though they might be unusual or surprising, and definitely aren’t typical romantic love ballads. There’s something that’s both creepy and honest to me in Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Game,” a look at a painful love you want desperately to but may never be able to escape.  It isn’t hard to imagine being so in love with someone you’re willing to do anything, like the singer of “Love Has No Pride,” by Bonnie Raitt. Likewise, Rickie Lee Jones’ “We Belong Together” might remind several listeners of times spent trying to convince a reticent partner that you’re absolutely made for each other.

These songs weren’t chosen ironically. I think that they’re good and that they represent common human experience.

The truth is, as everyone knows, there are many kinds of love. There’s no single answer or perspective.

But one thing I know at a dead certainty: love is the faith to leap, the trust to jump, the belief that, even though you don’t know what’s going to happen, you know there’s someone or something that’s going to make it alright.

And I thank my family for reminding me of this truth every single day of my life.

Batteries, Today

There was a time when Americans seriously prepared for a Japanese invasion of the West Coast. We can look back at that time with a sort of ironic amusement, I guess, but the truth is our war planners weren’t being completely paranoid; as we discovered many years after the Second World War, Japan did have plans for military action against California and did, in fact attack American Alaska.

So, starting in the late 1930s, the War Department constructed a series of artillery bases on the coast, several clustered around the Golden Gate: Battery Townsley, Battery Chamberlin, Battery Davis, and so on.

Here’s Battery Chamberlin, above what is now Baker Beach.

Battery Davis, during its working life:

And Battery Davis as it looks today:

Long since decommissioned and allowed to fall into disrepair, the artillery batteries that ring the entrance to the Golden Gate are now just crumbling curiosities. People mostly visit Fort Funston, the location of Battery Davis, to walk their dogs off-leash in a beautiful, open natural setting. Most visitors have no idea what these decrepit tunnels were originally constructed for, nor the enormous (but now welded-shut) underground vaults near them.

Probably just as well. These are now places to walk with best friends, smell the ocean (or occasional beach bonfire), appreciate the views, get some fresh air and quiet away from the city’s tumult, not to watch and wait for invasions. Thank God.

I hope you get some peaceful time with your best friend soon.

Don’t You Dare Miss It

Great places to visit, things to see and events to attend and be a part of – as Americans, we should be proud of the great diversity. Music. Food. Celebration. Parties. You could never see all of them but here’s a list of place-particular (and mostly annual) events I think you might want to put on your list before they’re sold to the highest corporate bidder or completely gone.

10. SXSW – Austin, Texas

People who’ve been going since the very first South-by-Southwest (SXSW) Festival might tell you it’s a shadow of its former self, but this event still brings together music, technology and social thinkers in original and fun ways.

9. Oregon Shakespeare Festival – Ashland, Oregon

What’s the best part of this festival? The plays? The production values? The acting? The naturally beautiful setting? The theater itself? All of the above. The audience is an exciting mix too.

8. College Basketball Final Four – Location varies

A good friend went to a final four years ago and still talks about the insanity of an arena filled with high-volume and high-energy bands, fans squeezed into replica team jerseys, plastic pig-heads and other totems of the teams playing.

7. Taste of Chicago – Chicago 

Chicago is an uncommonly beautiful city, especially during summer. Everyone who can is outside for as often and as long as they can be. Imagine a gorgeous lakeside park literally filled with the city’s best food and bands ranging from native blues to nasty hip hop.

6. Fleet Week – New York and San Francisco

I find it hard to completely describe the feelings Fleet Week stirs in me. My grandfather and father both went to sea, following a long family tradition, and I do feel somewhat at home on the water. The sailors who visit port during fleet week are young, smart, engaged and knowledgable – a delight to meet, and a source of pride for our country. The vessels themselves are of singular scale, gliding grey behemoths. And then, there are the insane flyovers by the Blue Angels.

5. Pride Parade – San Francisco

This parade stirs pride of a different sort. Since its wild Gold Rush days, San Francisco has  tended to make people of all stripes feel welcome. As a result, the city has always attracted people who have felt less than accepted, appreciated or loved elsewhere. “Come here,” San Francisco says, “and be yourself, completely. We’ll celebrate that together.”

4. Mummers Parade – Philadelphia 

Philadelphia may be known for a sort of button-down personality, but this is anything but. Insane, is what it is. Troops of men, painted in silver, clothed in wild color, carrying banjos, playing old tunes like “Golden Slippers,” marching down ice-cold winter streets of downtown.

3. Presidential Inauguration – Washington, DC

The particular identity of the person being inaugurated doesn’t matter. The party doesn’t matter. A million citizens come to the mall in our capital every four years to bear witness to the orderly transfer of power, one citizen to another, the result of an open, fair and free election, without force or coercion.

2. Mardi Gras – New Orleans

Famous and infamous. Superb music, insanely inventive floats, free-flowing drinks, a city full of people who just want to have an amazing time. What is there left to say about this month-long party in America’s party, music and booze capital? Laissez les bontemps roulez (let the good times roll, for non-francophones).

1. 4th of July – Boston 

The Pops come out to bring the enormous outdoor crowd to a frenzy of patriotism, even before the real fireworks begin. There are July 4th celebrations everywhere, but Boston gets it. Wicked.

Just Don’t

More than a few times, I’ve been the guy at the other end of the phone at 3 in the morning.

In my professional life, I’ve helped people and institutions get through crises – allegations of price fixing, financial impropriety, illicit drug manufacture, sale and use, sexual abuse, homicide, accidental death, miscellaneous criminal behavior, armed conflicts, environmental issues, industrial accidents, failures of judgment, natural disasters…

You get the idea.

I have seen a great many people when they’re not at their best – when they’re scared, angry, anxious, worried, embarrassed, ashamed, or all of the above.

And more than a few wished they could have done something differently, made a different decision, not done something they did, taken back an inopportune or inappropriate comment, done something instead of nothing, been more courageous, been less sexist, been more engaged in something they’ve ignored, been at a different place or time. Truthfully, though, once a thing is done, it’s done. You can’t unfire a gun.

Of course, some people are simply upset because they were caught, but I’ve often enough seen the pain of real human regret, and that can change a person; it can make you think about the things you’ve done that may have hurt or caused damage to things you hold dear.

So, I encourage you to take advantage of my hard-earned wisdom. If you’re thinking of cutting corners – be they legal, ethical, financial, or otherwise – think again. Trust me, the extra money isn’t worth it. Neither is the sex, the political power, or the potential advantage you think you’re going to bring to yourself or your company. At some point, someone, somewhere will ask you to defend what you did – maybe even publicly – and you won’t be able to. Then you’ll call me at 3 in the morning really upset, and I won’t be able to either. And then you’ll be in some really deep shit.

Now, I’d normally charge a great deal of money for advice like that, but my morning walk with DeeDee at Fort Funston put me in a giving and charitable mood.

You’re welcome.

BP’s Victims Get Day in Court, Perhaps

When the BP/Gulf oil spill case goes to trial in open court later this month, if it ever does, billions of dollars will be at stake, and not just for BP. The rig operator, Transocean, and the rig construction contractor, Halliburton, are also at significant financial risk. And signs don’t look good for them.

Several government probes have castigated BP, rig operator Transocean and Halliburton – which was responsible for the runaway well’s faulty cement job – for cutting corners and missing warning signs that could have prevented the disaster. – Economic Times, 2/15/12

Here are some uncertainties:

  • What portion of responsibility goes to which firm? Obviously, BP owned the facility, but key functions were performed by consultants, contractors and partners.
  • How will the court assess future potential losses which have yet to be specifically claimed? Effects on fisheries, for example, might take years or generations to present themselves.
  • Will this case ever get to actual trial and, if so, will it ever come to a decision? Many observers contend it won’t; they believe a settlement will be reached well before the public gets a full and public accounting of the worst oil disaster in US history.

Transocean and Halliburton have little contact with the general public, but BP has actual customers. Therefore, it has much more at stake from a public relations standpoint in these proceedings; and it has already proven itself less than able in that realm.

Whatever the case, many stakeholders are waiting for their day in court.

Real Insanity

I take back everything I said.

Mitt Romney is not a lock to win the Republican nomination for president. According to many polls, including this one from The New York Times, he and Rick Santorum are now in a statistical tie for first place in the campaign to be the GOP’s standard-bearer against Barack Obama.

Now, this may be a temporary blip. Public opinion polls are notoriously time-sensitive. They accurately capture attitudes and opinions for a very brief window of time. It may be that Mr. Santorum enjoys this time at or near the top among Republican voters for a short period, then sinks to join Bachmann, Perry, Cain, Gingrich and the others.

But it may signal a disturbing and longer-lasting trend for one of America’s great political parties. Remember, Republicans have, in the past, elected Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt and Dwight Eisenhower to the presidency and Robert La Follette, Nelson Rockefeller and George Romney (Mitt’s dad) to governorships. We may be watching the Republican party permanently evolving away from its Main Street, corporate, fiscal conservative roots, into the exclusive party of socially authoritarian, evangelical Christians.

[Sorry, I guess “evolving” was an inappropriate word to use in the previous sentence; after all, this new style of Republican doesn’t believe in evolution.]

Here’s Santorum, talking about the necessary (not advisable, not preferable, not ethically important, but necessary) connection between his understanding of God’s law and American civil law.

This is what Republicans want their political party to be about, to stand for? They must be insane.