Reflecting, perhaps, a startling (startlingly familiar?) lack of creativity and originality, there are at least 50 Hollywood remakes expected in the coming year. It’s almost as if someone said, “Hey, let’s re-release this really crappy movie in 3-D!” Oh wait, someone actually did that.
Here is an actual for-real list of remakes coming soon to a theater near you (this partial list doesn’t even include sequels or TV series remakes):
Dirty Dancing
Annie
All Quiet on the Western Front
A Star is Born
Barbarella
The Seven Samurai
Scarface
The Wild Bunch
Yellow Submarine
Time Bandits
About Last Night
American Psycho
Creature From the Black Lagoon
Death Wish
Leathal Weapon
Escape From New York
Porky’s
Romancing the Stone
The Bodyguard
Carrie
Robocop
The Birds
and even My Fair Lady, for fuck’s sake
Other than money, what do any of these remakes add? Don’t bother answering, the question is purely rhetorical.
Speaking Plainly 