State of the Union – Inside John’s Head

Focus, dammit!

No matter what happens, must not applaud. It’s what we all agreed to. Wouldn’t be a good example for the younger guys if I was up here applauding.

He just talked about our servicemen. What the hell do I do now? Just sit. Wait it out. He’ll be onto something else in a minute.

Well, crap. The Joint Chiefs are up and clapping now. Can’t just sit here. Got to clap now too. Crap.

Okay, he’s back to the economy. Won’t need to worry anymore. Budget this, economic opportunity, that. Doesn’t this guy ever get tired of hearing himself speak? Blah blah blah…

Can’t look bored. Those Goddamn TV C-SPAN cameras always get me when I’m yawning. I’ll look like I’m listening, just to be polite, but can’t look like I’m listening too hard.

Here he goes again, introducing some “regular” American in the gallery.  Going back to school to learn a new-economy trade. Hmmm. Good sounding story. No. Must not react. Wait a second, is that college in my district? Damn. Well, now I have to applaud.

Talking about energy. Natural gas. Oil shale. Renewables. Who gives a shit? Now, no one is listening. Even Chu is glazing over. Christ!

How long’s he been talking? Can’t look at my watch. Goddamn C-SPAN. I look at my watch, and that’s exactly when that Goddamn camera guy is sure to get me. Damn.

More crap. Is he winding up? Please. And here it is…”God bless the United States of America.” Finally.

Now we can get back to pursuing the people’s business. Hahahahahahaha. Little joke there. I say “pursuing the people’s business” when we all go into the caucus room for cocktails after a session. Pretty funny, huh? Hahahahahahaha.

God, I hate this thing.

2 thoughts on “State of the Union – Inside John’s Head

  1. Right on – precisely the thoughts I had while watching John in the background. It’s got to be tough. Suck it up John and no weeping

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